You Might Think There Are No Dumb Questions, But These Might Be An Exception

There’s an old saying you may have heard once. It goes "there are no dumb questions." However, every so often you get a real stinker of a question, and you might be left feeling awkward, scared, and confused.

It's hard to believe, but ...

We’ve all been there. You’re faced with a situation, and someone in your group raises such an obvious question, that you find yourself cupping your hands over your mouth, trying not to laugh.

It’s almost like you want to reach out to the person, slap them across the head, and shout “did you really just ask me that?” Fortunately for them, we’re calm, cool and collected. The following are several instances, where someone asked maybe the dumbest question on the planet, and we are left scratching our heads at their ridiculous logic.

1. In 1492 Columbus Motor Boated the Ocean Blue: In my high school class in the 90s, the teacher showed us a picture of Columbus’s three ships. A girl who was 15 in my class, asked: “What are those white things on top of the ship?” The teacher explained that they are sails, used to catch the wind and move the ships. Girl pipes up “that’s stupid! Why didn’t they just use the motors?” Everyone in the class including the teacher proceeded to facepalm. (Reddit user: lachesis99)


2. The Freshwater Pacific Coast: I was whitewater rafting in Massachusetts with a friend. A chatty woman behind us struck up a convo during a calm stretch and asked where we were from. We told her Vancouver, BC. She said it must be nice for us spending time on the water because “you probably don’t have any beaches or anything like this in Vancouver.” We tell her we’re on the Pacific coast, so the water was basically in our backyard. The woman then asks us “Oh. The Pacific… is that salt water?” (Reddit user: NoUserOnlyZuul)


3. The “Evening” Cave: We were about 1 mile into a cave system when a group of friends and I stop to take a small break. It was around 10:00 pm at night, so very dark when we entered the cave. When we stopped, the youngest of our group (23-year-old guy with a college degree) asks with complete seriousness if they could come back in the morning so they could see in the cavebetter. (Reddit user: 5meterhammer)


4. Sun… Moon… What’s the Difference?: A friend said to me once “When you see the sun and the moon at the same time, is the moon the reflection from the sea in space?” I didn’t know what they were talking about so after some investigating I realized that she thought the sun and the moon were the same things. Just that the moon was not “on fire” at night. (Reddit user: deleted)


5. The Fifth Beatle Band Member: In class, someone pipes up “Joseph Stalin, is that the Beatles guy?” The entire class just went dead silent for around five seconds and we all stared at her. The teacher broke the silence and finally said “no.” That was a senior class… (Reddit user: RenegonParagade)


6. High Altitude at Sea: We were on vacation at the seashore, and we were doing some cardio training on the beach. One of the guys we were working with got kind of winded and asked, “Damn, I wonder what the altitude is here?” Uh… sea level. (Reddit user: [EXPLETIVE]-eastwould.)


7. Human-Dolphin Birthing: In my 9th-grade biology class after learning about stem cells and how unborn fetuses contain a lot of them, a student in my class asked: “So if a pregnant woman ate a dolphin, would her baby come out as a dolphin?” I seriously wish I was joking. (Reddit user: wagglemonkey)


8. How Did He Become A Manager? I made a joke about hitchhiking to Alaska. My manager said “Oh that’ll work. What, are you gonna take a ferry?” I told him there’s a major highway that goes there. The manager asks if they built a bridge there. I had no idea what he was talking about. My manager then asked, “Is Alaska not an island next to Hawaii?” (Reddit user: MothMonsterMan300)


9. It’s a Miracle!: I broke two bones in my back while playing football. The next week I was WALKING down the hall with a brace. The girl at my school wanted to know what happened. I told her I broke two bones in my back. Her response, “Are you paralyzed?” (Reddit user: who035733)


10. Customer Wants Magic Trees: I work in a nursery in Canada, and a customer wanted to buy a maple tree. She asked me “what happens to the leaves in the winter?” I explained that it was a deciduous tree so the leaves fall off and grow back in the spring. This didn’t impress her, so she asked if we had any trees where the leaves didn’t fall off. I showed her some evergreens and she said “No, not Christmas trees, I hate those ugly needles. I want big leaves like the maple that don’t fall off.” (Reddit user: frozennie)


11. The Power of Gas: I noticed gas prices started to go up rapidly, so I told my girlfriend that should fill up her tank because she would get more fuel for her money, rather than when the price goes up in a couple days. Her reply was “Oh, is that because of the power of the gasoline?” I still don’t know what she meant by that. (Reddit user: eldududuro)


12. American Border Patrol: I was crossing the US/Canada border and the guard asked me if I was a Canadian citizen. I handed him my passport and said yes. He looked at my license plate and asked me, “If you’re from Canada, why does your license plate say Manitoba?” It took me a second to realize he was being serious. I explained that Manitoba was a province in Canada, and silently marveled at his stupidity. (Reddit user: ListenToTheStooges)


13. The Oceans Many Colours: My brother was working on a beach in the Grand Cayman. A woman came up with a normal question “Can I please have three cups?” but her reason… She liked the various shades of blue in the water and wanted a cup for each cup to fill and take home. He gave her the cups. (Reddit user: Lauie)


14. Not So Thoughtful: Had a friend who scolded me “Why do you think about everything? That’s the difference between us. You think about everything, and I just DO.” Later on, this same person had to leave to join the army because he dropped out of college, was over $15,000 in debt, and had to pay child support for his daughter and Ex-Girlfriend. He spent so much time in retail that he had no applicable job skills outside customer service. Not much of a thinker. (Reddit user: Seivan09)



15. The South is Closed: In my country, when we talk about travel, especially to warmer countries, we call it “going south.” A girl I knew once asked me, “but is the south open in the winter?” I left. Once I was gone and out of earshot, I laughed so hard that my ribs were sore. (Reddit user: Tjodleik)


16. The Very Cold War: In 7th grade, we had this girl who was on a roll with dumb questions in our class. She asked if Martin Luther King was still alive, and when on to ask “Why was the Cold War called that? Was It really cold?” This was back in 2003. Today she’s still asking questions like this. (Reddit user: Dame_Dame)


17. I’ve Known Her For Years: The other night we were having dinner at our house, and my family and their friends were over. They were discussing how long they had known each other. Then my Uncle asked his wife how long she had known her sister. Her sister. (Reddit user: redpandalover69)


18. Asleep During Class: One of the guys in my class fell asleep during a lecture. The professor goes into a 20 minute VERY detailed and technical explanation on topic X. After he’s done he asks if anyone has any questions. The sleeping guy woke up and then asks “Yeah, can you talk about topic X?” Professor has this priceless look on his face and asks “are you messing with me right now?”


19. The True Meaning Of Christmas: Sitting in our history class, we were learning about WWII. The teacher explains about the Battle of Hong Kong. Mentions how on the 25th of December in 1941, the Canadian garrison there surrendered. A girl in my class raised her hand and asked: “Is that why it’s called Christmas?” We all just sat there for a minute in silence. (Reddit user: Doom_Art)


20. Finger Licking Good: When I was in culinary school, the chef showed us how to cut and prepare a chicken. He explained that the part of the breast is typically used to make chicken strips. This one guy, completely serious, pipes up, “If that’s the chicken strip, which part is the chicken nugget?” Everyone went silent and the chef explained that there’s no part of the chicken called the nugget. (Reddit user: CreativeSparks5)


21. Please Stand For the National Anthem: In boot camp, another recruit asked if veterans with no legs were required to stand for the national anthem. The subject being saluting etiquette, the commander had to answer the question “Of Course Not!” You could tell that he wanted to kick the recruit’s butt. (Reddit user: Lyn1987)


22. The Men’s Department: While I was working at Walmart, someone asked me where the men’s clothing was. I was standing right next to the men’s clothing, and they had to walk straight past and parallel to the men’s clothing to get to me. It took up a good section of the store too. Had they turned 45 degrees to their left they would have seen it. (Reddit user: Keinichn)


23. Which Compass?: I’m a college student studying geometry. This one girl who routinely asks stupid questions asked the worst ones on day one. The professor told us we’d need a compass. The girl says “I have a protractor that’s the same thing right?” The professor explains that it isn’t and we’d need a compass. So the girl asks “You mean the round ones that show you directions? Can I just use the GPS on my phone?” The Professor had to physically show her what a drawing compass was. (Reddit user: DaileDoe)


24. 911 What’s Your Emergency?: I’m a 911 dispatcher. Got a call from a woman asking “What do you mean 911 can’t look up the number to Walmart on the main street for me. That’s what 911 is for! To SERVE and protect me. I pay your salary!” Um… no. Google it, you jerk! (Reddit user: muhaccount)



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