1. They always want the one cuddly toy you can’t find – always!
2. Kids always NEED one more story, and another one, and another one. PLEEEASE mum I can’t sleep without another story!!
3. They suddenly hate, and we mean hate their pajamas!
4. Little babies become grouchy and rub their eyes when they are tired (hurrah!), but when in that darkened bedroom they refuse the boob or bottle! Guaranteed!
5. Your small baby has fallen asleep in your arms (literally they are out for the count!) so you carefully place them down in the cot and…ping! They are suddenly awake! How, why!!!!
6. You rock said baby back to sleep and cuddle them for an extra few minutes and place them down in the cot to sleep and…ping! Your phone goes off and wakes them up!
7. The one time you plan to leave the kids with your parents or a babysitter is the one night they suddenly feel ill, are teething or throwing up. GRRRR.
8. Toddlers get a rush of energy when stripped down and want to run/crawl everywhere, grabbing things as they go. Messy and annoying!
9. Sometimes you have to tell a white lie or two! ‘Shhhh daddy is fast asleep too,’ when he is in the kitchen making dinner (pouring your wine!!!), ‘It is nearly midnight’, when in fact it’s only 8pm, and ‘There is no more milk left’ when there are several pints in the fridge!
10. Blackout blinds become your best friend in the summer. You spend ages, carefully making sure every little inch of sunlight is blocked out. Sunshine is BAD at bedtime. Fact.
11. When you are knackered and ill, somehow kids manage to make bath time and bedtime last hours. And hours!
12. Just as you put your little one in a clean nappy and pristine white sleep suit – they do a massive, explosive poo.
13. They manage to drink 5 bottles a day without spilling an ounce, but before their bedtime bottle they puke. Everywhere. Great.
14. They will tell you anything not to go to sleep – they have a tummy ache, they are scared of the dark, they love you…oooh it just keeps on coming!
15. You’ve got to move quick because the more tired kids become the more crazed and erratic they are. Overtired kids = war zone!
16. When you buy that bottle of wine for a Saturday night it’s guaranteed to be the one night the kids don’t settle till crazy o’clock. They KNEW mum wanted that vino, they knew!
17. Little toddler boys have the annoying habit of peeing the minute they are naked. And it’s always on the freshly washed bed.
But, hey we wouldn’t change it for the world!