1. Always Know when Your Lover is Unhappy … or, Er, Happy
Maybe your boo likes being miserable (Heather knows this struggle). Maybe you're in love with somebody who's only happy when it rains. Whatever the case, know what makes your lover unhappy ... or happy.
2. The Couple Who Judges Together Stays Together
That fabulous moment when you share an opinion without even looking at each other.
3. Dance like No One's Looking
If Gomez and Morticia can teach us one thing, it's how to keep the passion alive...
4. No, Seriously, Forget the World and do Your Thing
...and how to be silly together. Serious. Dance together more, even if you're both bad at it.
5. Never Let Your Lover Get Bored
This goes back to the spice thing, but remember, it's not all about sex.
6. Learn How to Make Every Day a Holiday
Learn how to make every day our favorite holiday. If your favorite holiday is Halloween, then Gomez and 'Tish should definitely be your spirit couple.
7. Figure out Your Beloved's Favorite Kinks
Does your girl love having her ear nibbled? Is the boy of your dreams crazy about kissing? Does your partner in crime have a little pain kink? Figure it out.
8. Ladies, Always Compliment Your Gomez
Let your lover know how awesome s/he is. Say it often. Stroke the ego.
9. Gentlemen, do the Same for Your Morticia
Partners need to compliment each other. Dating, married, hooking up, it doesn't matter. Say something sweet every once in a while.
10. Learn about Each Other's Favorite Foods
Learning how your partner takes her/his coffee, if you prefer salt or pepper, your favorite takeout place, and all those little things – it's important. It shows that you're interested and that you care.
11. Never Go to Bed on an Argument
Seriously. Don't torture yourself.
12. Don't Be Afraid to Define Things for Each Other
Exactly. Your idea of torture might be your lover's idea of heaven. Also, Raul Julia's Gomez just makes my knees weak.
13. Have a Realistic View of Your Relationship
Even Gomez and Morticia had problems. They also had Pugsley so, you know, count yourselves lucky.
14. Always Know when to Shut up
Remember, sometimes it's more important to listen than it is to speak. There will also come a point in your relationship where you just need to stfu.
15. Make the Most of Your Romantic Evenings – No Matter What the Weather
There's a silver lining hiding behind every cloud ... and every raindrop.
16. Strive to Please Each Other
And don't be afraid to ask your boo for what pleases you, either.
17. Promise to Love Each Other Forever
That reminds me ... Heather, I cannot tell you how grateful I am that our lifeless bodies will be rotting together for all eternity.